Stepparent of the Year?
This is the kind of stepparent I am:
Last summer, we went to a wedding for one of Matt’s cousins. Ethan, then six, looked dashing in his suit. We accepted that he would play in it and get it dirty, so there was only one problem: the clip on tie.
Apparently the metal of the clip was touching his neck and irritating him. We made it as comfortable as possible but it’s not like we could loosen it.
After the pictures were taken, I got an idea. I told him, “you know, if you clipped it to your back buckle loop, it wouldn’t touch your skin. And it would look like a tail!”
Ethan was delighted and he wore it on his butt the rest of the wedding, which delighted others as well. But Matt was not pleased. I’m not sure his parents approved either, though usually Ethan can do no wrong.
“He’s wearing it!” I protested. “I’m a genius!”
No more was said about it, but next time I guess I need to go through Matt before I make any more of my costuming compromises.
Rachel Lewis
Welcome! I’m a middle-aged former Mormon (aka the “other FOMO”), essayist, and playwright living in Salt Lake City. I work in pharmaceuticals professionally and write recreationally—though I’m open to reversing that someday. On Life and Lemons is where I share humorous snippets about writing, addiction, recovery, relationships, mental health, and whatever else life tosses in the blender. If you enjoy dark humor with a twist of lemon-tart snark—or just need proof that your own life isn’t the only one held together by twist ties and good intentions—you’re in the right place. You can follow me and get updates on the release of my new essay collection at instagram.com/pieces_of_string/. 🍋 Subscribe and let’s overthink things together.
One Comment
quietwatercraft
I’m with you; at least he was wearing it!