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Nervous Tick
In the summer of 1999, Jules and Demetria and I were on a long road trip through the Louisiana and Texas. I had never been to the South before and I found it quite mysterious. I had never experienced humidity before, for one thing. And the bugs down there are mind-blowing. I remember being astonished by the number and size of the bugs I saw, but mostly I was amazed by the sound. We have crickets in Utah and they sing quietly on warm nights. The crickets they have in the South are something else, entirely. I honestly don’t know how anyone in Texas gets a good night’s sleep in…
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I Might Not Be the Alpha
Me: Dude, you CANNOT be on the couch. You are too big! The Dog: Yes I can; I can prove it… Me: No… Get… Gerrofff… Down! Gosh darn you are heavy! The Dog: I propose a compromise. Me: Fine. Whatever lets me focus this episode of Game of Thrones.
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Dog and Mouse
Wensley whimpered in his sleep this morning. Then he woke with a start and clambered to cuddle with me, pushing his way on to my chest and nuzzling his nose in under my chin. I realized he was shaking and I tried to reassure him. He has been acting strangely all morning and won’t stray from my side. I finally put his bed next to my monitor so I could get some work done. That wasn’t close enough, however. It’s kind of endearing , but it’s worrying also. He’s never acted like this before. What could he have dreamt about that put him in this state, even hours later? I…
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An Evening With Ira
Tonight, I told Ira Glass that I have a dog. It may have been the shortest interview that he ever conducted, but I feel that my entire life has been validated. This happened; I may now die without regret. ~ Ira: Okay, you: you get the last question. Me: I just want to know how Piney is doing. Ira: Piney??? (There was no recollection on his face… I thought I got the name wrong.) Me: Your dog? Ira: I know who Piney is. I assume you are asking because you have a dog? Me: Yes. Ira: What kind? Me: Yorkshire terrier. Ira: Has he ever bitten anyone? Me: Yes (are…
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Snowballs
I need someone to do some research on why it is impossible to get snow off of a terrier. I finally gave up and put him in the tub to thaw like a 12 pound turkey.
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Happy Halloween
My dog has a condition that makes his trachea collapse when he gets excited. Like… Say… When the mailman comes. Probably to murder us. All dogs know that mailmen are evil and have a freak out but mine does that and then spends fifteen minutes trying to get air back in his lungs without sounding like a Harley Davidson. Once or twice a day, no biggie. Halloween? Nightmare on Elm Street. (There are a lot of elm trees on my street, but that’s not really what it’s called.) So I’m opting out. I feel badly about it. Sort of. But this is what I’m doing this year. Candy is candy,…
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Maybe I Shouldn’t Name This One?
Dog Momming rule #557: do not replace destroyed dog toys with even more adorable dog toys, for that path assuredly leads to heart break.
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Poor Eeyore
Rule #556 of Dog Momming: do NOT get emotionally attached to your dog’s toys. They do not belong to you and you cannot save them.
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My Handsome Hound
They say that dogs don’t have the ability to recognize themselves in a mirror, but I’ve caught my pooch gazing at his reflection so often, I am convinced he gets it. I am also convinced he is just a little vain. But look at this darling mug. Can you blame him?
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This…
is what throw pillows are for. And one from the side…