Oh, Barbie…

Dear Barbie,

I saw you in the store last weekend, and I have to tell you I’m a little disappointed in you. I know you are under a lot of pressure from your boss because sales have been low, and you never pretended to be the classiest act in the toy aisle, but this is just sad. And don’t give me that story about having student loan payments to make, because we all know THAT isn’t true.

At least you have some Mardi Gras beads on. That’s one thing we can say for you, Honey. You always know how to accessorize.

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Welcome! I’m a middle-aged former Mormon (aka the “other FOMO”), essayist, and playwright living in Salt Lake City. I work in pharmaceuticals professionally and write recreationally—though I’m open to reversing that someday. On Life and Lemons is where I share humorous snippets about writing, addiction, recovery, relationships, mental health, and whatever else life tosses in the blender. If you enjoy dark humor with a twist of lemon-tart snark—or just need proof that your own life isn’t the only one held together by twist ties and good intentions—you’re in the right place. You can follow me and get updates on the release of my new essay collection at instagram.com/pieces_of_string/. 🍋 Subscribe and let’s overthink things together.

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